A few years ago my mother was struggling with her health. In a short period of time she had lost over seventy pounds of weight and was rapidly declining. She lacked energy suffering from severe pains in her abdomen which led to the inability to digest food. The only coping mechanism she had to control the severe pain and its subsequent issues was starvation.

For four and a half years she suffered in relative silence with the exception of constant doctor visits that left her in complete frustration. She was continually prescribed little blue pills to assist with acid buildup and repeatedly told that her digestive issues were not overly serious but attributed to her growing age.

Refusing to accept such answers, she held her head high with grace and dignity and became an advocate for herself and her physical health. With the help from another person she was able to secure an appointment with specialist. Upon her first visit a series of tests were scheduled and executed rapidly. By the end of this battery of tests, she was subjected to some very heavy lines of questioning. She recalls sitting in the large sterile room with her hospital gown on prepped and ready for the most evasive test of them all. There were eight doctors in the room all holding clipboards and writing rapidly as they whispered to each other. More and more questions would follow each whisper.

She found out some time later that the specialist was expecting to find and deliver the news that over four years of negligence had led to a most devastating diagnosis: stage 4 colon cancer. The white coated, clipboard holding, note taking, whispering smattering of bodies in the room were there bracing themselves for a lawsuit of epic proportions.

Those who trust in riches will be ruined, but a good person will be healthy like a green leaf.
Proverbs 11:28

But my mother knew the truth. The truth that no amount of money would cure a disease nor put a grieving mind at ease. She trusted that the Lord knew what was happening even if she didn’t, and she trusted her gut instinct that something was amiss so she advocated for the truth not placing all her trust in the hands of a man who made a mistake.

To say she was overjoyed to hear that it wasn’t cancer after all would be an understatement, but her life did drastically change when she learned that she was suffering from an incurable disease that would need to be treated all the days of her life.

I learned from my mother a great lesson in leaning upon the Lord in times of trouble by not inviting bitterness in when trust has been broken. Each one of us possesses a God shaped hole in our soul that can only be filled by the presence of Jesus. When that God shaped hole sits dormant, no trace of the Spirit to be seen, there is a gut instinct within us to fill it. A gut instinct that something is amiss.

So, we try to fill it with whatever makes us happy, whatever makes us feel whole, and we place our trust in that which shouldn’t be trusted. And far too often our sinful nature causes us to do this over and over again. It is as if our deep rooted desire for fulfillment becomes an incurable disease.

But God made us a promise that He was the Great Healer. When we can put our trust in Him- and Him alone- Jesus can bring us the greatest fulfillment we have even known filling the God shaped hole and healing every disease that brings sickness to our soul.

Father, my faith in you and your promises are all that will sustain me in times of trouble. Help me to see your hand at work in my life when trusting is hard for me to do. Though there are things in my life that seem like an easy fix to fill the God shaped hole in my soul, may I trust and remember that only Jesus can bring me true fulfillment. In Jesus name, amen.